How do you get the hospital to transfer Mom to the nursing home when she doesn't want to go?

I don't know where to begin on this one. I had that problem with my mom, she was so far in denial and my father who had one good and arm and Parkinson's could not take care of her. I was in the same town and could come on a daily basis but there was not way to get her into the bathroom at all, i couldn't even do it. I was dealing with a Dr. who was not her primary and he was clueless and told me i had to take her home. I was pretty forceful and told him the home situation, and asked him how my father was going to get her to the bathroom? He finally agreed when she couldn't stand up for him. It was a nightmare and my mom made sure everyone knew i was taking her to die. Long story short, i hope there is a better way than what i had to go through my mom passed away within 2 weeks. There would have been no way to bring her home without live-in help and both had declined that.

tell them there is no one to care for mom at home. They will have no choice but to arrange for LTC for her. That is what the nurses told me when my dad was in the hospital and I couldn't care for him at home. The social worker will ask you if you have a preference as to which facility you would like to have her placed in. She will contact them to see if they have a bed available. I chose homes in my area so that I could visit often. The social worker is used to doing this. You can arrange to meet the ambulance that will be taking her to the home when she gets there. That way she may feel better about going. Good Luck and check on her often.

If it is not appropriate for Mom to go home alone, post-hospital stay, then Social Services can talk to mom and call the doctor. Home Care after hospitalization may not be able to provide enough service in combination with family care. So SS needs to get a full picture of what can and cannot be provided at home. Then SS can advise the physician and the physician can talk to the patient and explain why residential care is best. And as was pointed out previously, this does not have to be a permanent solution. Also some people get into a residential facility and find out that it is not so bad; they make friends and the staff is kind, it is not always the horror that they expect. So get a Social Services referral -- talk to the nurses and they can make this happen.

This reminds me of a situation with a LTC faclilty resident where I am the Ombudsman. The resident was in dire need of a surgical procedure but refused. I was asked by the administrator for my input. I spoke to the resident and found that there was critical information not related to the resident. Short story, an informed person, if presented with the necessity of any action will generally make a sound decision. Perhaps, a "care plan"type meeting with her doctor, nursing staff and a rep from the Area Agency on Aging in attendance would give her a different picture. To many people believe that a LTC facility is where "I go to die", not so. Many, many now provide extensiveshort term stay rehab treatment.