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JoAnn11 Asked September 2018

Why are my sisters treating me like crap? Never call me, never ask how I am, or even how I'm doing with dad?

 They're alway mad at me.😔

JoAnn29 Sep 2018
Because they are afraid of what you will say. By asking you how things are going, that puts them in a position where you may ask for help. They don't want to help so no calls.

Write them nice little notes. Telling them you and Dad have missed them. It would be so nice to have them visit. Put a guilt trip on them. If they visit, that would be the time to mention it would be nice if they could sit with Dad every so often so you could have sometime to yourself to shop, go to a movie, what ever.

Ahmijoy Sep 2018
Are they truly angry with you for something you didn’t include in your post? How did it come to be that you are taking care of your father alone? Did you volunteer or were you volunteered? Only we are responsible for ourselves and how we feel about things. We can’t count on other people, even family members, to make us feel good or validated. We don’t have to be doormats to these people or constantly try to make them like us. We have to feel good about ourselves and not really care all that much how others feel about us. That’s a hard concept to accept, especially when the people treating us like crap are blood relatives. My husband is estranged from his sisters and brother for just that reason. I’m alone here caring for him and no one from his family ever calls, texts or emails to ask about him. The last time we were together at a party, no one even asked about him.

If you are your father’s caregiver, hopefully you have the legal authority of a Power of Attorney in case you ever need it. If not and he is competent, get one now. See an Elder Law Attorney. If things are getting too much to handle, and you think your sisters should be involved, start thinking about placement for Dad, unless of course one of the others wants to take him. If it comes to that, your sisters will need to know.

Do the best best you can for as long as you can. File for Medicaid if you need to and get help. Don’t count on others for help. Like me, you’ll be very disappointed.

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Sunnygirl1 Sep 2018
Some people are strange. When people don't call me, I figure they are really busy, too sick or just don't want to talk with me.

What was the last thing that you discussed with them for them to be mad at you? Do they agree with you caring for your dad in the home? I know that can generate some resentment. When seniors have serious need of care and one person tries to do it in the home, I think that other family members may be bothered, if they don't agree on the plan. I'm just speculating. If you are clueless about their behavior, I might send a little note or card that says, we miss you, call when you can and see what happens.

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