How to "bribe" parent into bathing & washing hair?

Yes, I have talked with them about it. I even told them to tell her if she wanted to go to dinner with some family friends who were visiting her, she had to shower & wash her hair first. Its worked a couple of times. Thanks.

Vickie, I believe this is common as we age. I know for myself, as I am now long in the tooth, that taking a shower and washing my hair feels like I spent hours at the gym. It is just so darn tiring. I just spray myself down with Lysol before going to work [just kidding].

My Dad's was very shy about letting a caregiver give him a shower. After saying no enough times, the caregiver put her hands on her hips and said "Mr. Bob, I raised a household of boys, there isn't anything I hadn't seen". That got my Dad laughing and it was smooth sailing after that.

Your Mom is of that era when rose scented powder was the norm. Smelled wonderful. If that is something she might enjoy it would be worth looking for such a product. Maybe the Vermont Country Store may sell it. Have the Aide reward Mom with some of the powder after a shower, and have the Staff comment on how great she smells :)

This is a relatively common problem with dementia, if the facility can't/won't handle it then it may no longer be an appropriate place for her, especially considering that her needs will continue to increase.

The aides shouldn't ask IF she'd like to shower.

Ideally there should be a schedule ( say, Mondays and Fridays at 8 am). The aide should arrive and say " it's time for your shower!".