You might want to actually research pot use and it’s affect on the brain because it’s pretty harmless & likely not the reason he’s making bad decisions. Now if he was doing meth or cocaine, that would be another story.
I understand your concern about poor decision-making, but I doubt the pot is the cause. (In fact, it's even possible your brother is using pot to self-medicate for a mental or physical health disorder.) I suggest focusing on the bad decisions, your brother's frequent absences, and your permanent presence as reasons for your mom to change the POA.
Thank you for the advice. You’re right! I should focus on those issues. As you know, this is a stressful situation without family discord, so the added bonus of my brother’s unreasonable position, everything is magnified. I’ll take a deep breath and some time to think this over.
No. Your mother appointed him. If smoking weed is illegal where he lives, it is no longer a felony unless he is selling it and has a large supply. If he is caught smoking it, it is a misdemeanor. I can see why you are nervous about his having POA over your mother, though. Do you have any siblings? Have you spoken with a lawyer about this?
If I have to get a lawyer I will. My sister is trying to mediate but he is still being a jerk. I’m going to take some time to see what develops. Thanks for your reply, I know we all have limited time to ourselves.
It isn't your fault that your mother gave power of attorney to your brother. You say brother convinced your dad. But only your mother could make the decision.
You have already once had to step away from caregiving on the advice of your physician. Raised eyebrows over some of your brother's decisions are a reason to discuss the decisions. They're not a reason to get sucked in again.
So if you don't mind my asking, have you really thought this through?
Your mother can, if she's still competent and it's the right sort of POA. Or, if your brother is convicted of an offence which disqualifies him from holding POA for someone, the state can. Haven't a clue whether what he's smoking would count. It may be illegal in that state, but are prosecutions common there?
I assume this isn't actually the reason you don't think your mother's POA is safe in his hands. What are the more pertinent reasons? Wouldn't it be better to pursue those?
Sorry, the POA is for my mom. Pot is illegal in this state. I’m concerned that he is high when making decisions because some of them just don’t make sense. They aren’t always in line with what medical professionals are advising. There are plenty of other reasons including the fact that he only lives here 6 months out of the year and has never been here for any medical emergencies. He also doesn’t return from the other state when there is an emergency. I live here full time and am with her every step of the way. I think it would make sense for me to have POA. He convinced my dad that they should change when I had to step away from their care on advice of my physician after many years of being the sole caregiver.
Is this your POA or that of someone else? If yours, you can change a POA for any reason as long as you haven't been deemed incapable mentally of doing so. If it's someone else's, you have no authority to make any changes at all.
7 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
ADVERTISEMENT
If smoking weed is illegal where he lives, it is no longer a felony unless he is selling it and has a large supply. If he is caught smoking it, it is a misdemeanor. I can see why you are nervous about his having POA over your mother, though.
Do you have any siblings? Have you spoken with a lawyer about this?
It isn't your fault that your mother gave power of attorney to your brother. You say brother convinced your dad. But only your mother could make the decision.
You have already once had to step away from caregiving on the advice of your physician. Raised eyebrows over some of your brother's decisions are a reason to discuss the decisions. They're not a reason to get sucked in again.
So if you don't mind my asking, have you really thought this through?
He may be breaking the law, but in my whole life I have never seen ANYONE arrested for smoking pot, whether it was legal or not.
You should talk to mom. It's her call.
Your mother can, if she's still competent and it's the right sort of POA. Or, if your brother is convicted of an offence which disqualifies him from holding POA for someone, the state can. Haven't a clue whether what he's smoking would count. It may be illegal in that state, but are prosecutions common there?
I assume this isn't actually the reason you don't think your mother's POA is safe in his hands. What are the more pertinent reasons? Wouldn't it be better to pursue those?
There are plenty of other reasons including the fact that he only lives here 6 months out of the year and has never been here for any medical emergencies. He also doesn’t return from the other state when there is an emergency. I live here full time and am with her every step of the way. I think it would make sense for me to have POA. He convinced my dad that they should change when I had to step away from their care on advice of my physician after many years of being the sole caregiver.