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patriciaJewelsz Asked March 2022

I worry that my family is on gov't money and that a facility would take advantage of my 85-year-old mother physically, mentally, financially, Any advice?

How to get myself prepared emotionally knowing who my mother truly is and she is NOT this stupid disease (Dementia). I am physically disabled on SSD (scoliosis) back surgery, diabetes, overweight, over eater due to toxicity raising and trying to spiritually grow, but now hard with my dementia, narcissist mother whom I love. I lose my temper now, and I am ambivalent on moving my mother to such a place. No one in this household is happy at all. NOPE. I pray for answers, meditate, journal, have a counselor. I need help beyond what I am asking. What is make the strife so thicker in my home is my car was totaled since December 2021. And we're in these 4 walls way too much. Hard to get an Uber here in my town. This is not Atlanta, GA. I am under Atlanta 2+ hours. I cry for help/advice. I am needing a car, but can't afford one. I am the type to pray for my enemies. Any human can only take so much. I need an attorney for my mother. She was scammed, and we tried but no success. My mother has a (boy cried wolf record) where she asks with loving desire and the truth comes out that shows cognitive troubles and then no one trusts her. They call her crazy. I could write a book.

JoAnn29 Mar 2022
Personal info still in profile. Reported

Sendhelp Mar 2022
Admins,
Please review the profile to help remove this poster's personal details. Thanks, for her protection.

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JoAnn29 Mar 2022
Call your County Office on Aging. Tell them you need help getting Mom the help she needs and you can no longer do the care because u are disabled. Your Mom cannot be taken advantage of financially because being on Medicaid she will have no more than 2k in the bank. If she has any assets, they will need to be spent down before Medicaid will take over. My daughter, RN in NH) says staff has no idea who is Medicaid and who isn't. So everyone is treated the same.

You could probably get some resources the O on A too. Someone suffering from Dementia should not care for someone also suffering from Dementia. You need to plan how your care will be handled too. Do not expect family to do the caring.

lealonnie1 Mar 2022
This is a chat forum for caregivers to the elderly. Based on your profile, I'm not sure where you think you are and what kind of help you think we can give you, as ordinary laymen from all over the world?

Losing your temper at home & living in an unhappy household is not helping your mother, or you, to live peacefully under the same roof. As 'bad' as you may think it is to get mom into a nursing home, it will be for the GOOD of BOTH of you to do so. If she's using government money, how can the facility 'take advantage of her financially????' Be an advocate FOR your mother while she's living in the nursing home by visiting her often and making sure she's cared for properly. "Praying for your enemies" is not doing a darn thing for you today, in the situation you're in, where you can no longer care for your mother who's suffering from dementia. She's not 'the boy who cried wolf', but an elder who needs help that she can get in a nursing home. Look into Medicaid NOW to get her placed and out of your home, for her own sake as well as yours.

Now go over to your profile page and fix it; get rid of the personal names you've put there. Realize that this is a chat forum and nothing more. If you need help placing mother, on the right side of the screen, press the GET FREE HELP button and speak with a care advisor about your next move.

Good luck.

AlvaDeer Mar 2022
Admins:
Reporting post because of personal names and addresses listed in the profile of this new OP.
Patricia. I am relieved that you have a counselor; please lean upon him or her and ask for help with your many issues. I am sorry you are going through all of these problems. I think that they are beyond the ability of anyone on a general Forum to do anything but sympathize with you, which I am certain we all do.
Please try to go into your profile at once and remove any personal information, Patricia. Don't ever put this out on social media; it can be dangerous.
My best wishes go out to you and I am sorry you are going through all of this.

BarbBrooklyn Mar 2022
Please remove your personal information from your profile immediately.

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