4 days, 35 phone calls and at least 1 dozen in-person visits plus a nurse's visit = still not enough? Normal amount of contact?

Well, I took my stepmother for a cognitive impairment test, it was basically useless, we had already identified that her brain was not functioning properly.

IMO the questions that they asked her were nebulous. The doctor spoke to her in do, do, da, da terms.

The sound wave test showed that her front temporal was shrinking, the outcome was there is really nothing that can be done, bring her back in 6 months, for what exactly?

Total waste of time.

She was in AL, last week we moved her into MC, she is just fine, likes it smaller apartment, new friends and more activities.

Some are very pesty my step mother is not, she seems to go with the flow.

Now, my mother is in another AL, she is 97 and very demanding, my brother and I have boundaries and we stick to them, if we didn't she would eat us alive.

Time to set your boundaries, believe me your mother will adjust.

She needs other people besides you. My mom did that too until she forgot how to use the phone. But then she wanted the care givers to call. They would divert her if they could. I eventually answered only if I had not seen or talked to her a couple times already that day if I knew someone else was there. Friends or grandchildren could be called if just to chat. Give her a list of numbers, but also the part time care giver you are going to hire will help.

She may be perceiving that her mental/cognitive abilities are slipping and that is leading to her heightened neediness and anxiety.

It may be a good time to enlist a companion aid. Someone whose job is to mostly hang out with her, take her on errands, help her complete light housework, meal prep, hygiene (if necessary), play cards or games or puzzles with, tv-watching buddy, etc. My 2 elderly Aunts who lived together shared a single companion from an agency who was Italian-American (like them) and grew up in NYC (like them) and shared the same political leanings as them. They had her for 6 wonderful years, and she was just awesome. The right people are out there if you give yourself time to look, to get ahead of any need during a crisis.

Your mom probably is having memory issues and also at the beginning of dementia people's filters break and boundaries become invisible (an unimportant) to their urgent need for something minor. A part-time companion will help a lot and it does matter that she gets used to the right person at an early stage because acceptance isn't always guaranteed when their cognitive issues increase, even if Mother Teresa was the companion.

I've also learned to say "no" to my mom when she comes to me holding her broken object that needs gluing that minute or the outrageous they-overcharged-me insurance bill that she wants me to call and b**** about (but not if it's during my time doing client related work, which she forgets that I'm not retired yet). She sometimes will act frustrated or put-out by this, but she gets over it. There will be a lot more unfiltered interactions and trampled boundaries, so better to start getting them set up now than later when she is much less able to learn them.

If you are making all these visits and accepting all the calls then you are a 50% partner in all of this in some respects. It enables Mom to do this.
Have a nice sit down talk with her. That will tell you a lot. She may be angry or depressed and you might get "WELL!!!!! I am sorry for even LIVING!!!!" Just let her know you are concerned about the increase and would like to know if she has any insight into why it might be. Tell her you love her, but you are very very busy. Let her know you will check in briefly in the a.m. and in the p.m.
Remember those good old days when our phone wasn't attached to our hand?
Leave the phone at home.
Make certain Mmom has emergency numbers.
And ASK MOM. Ask her if she is lonely, worried, depressed? Tell her you are sorry, and perhaps together you two can troubleshoot that. But that the number of calls is out of the question and can't continue. Let her know you will be leaving your phone at home, or off for some hours during the day. Make certain she has emergency numbers she may need.
We would be guessing at what's going on. But MOM has the answers. Or is more likely to than we are. I sure wish you both the best.