Hi! I have a caregiver from an agency that comes in regularly to take care of my mom. My mom has dementia, is immobile, slow to process questions, etc. basically can’t do anything for herself. This caregiver bugs me. She is very experienced and very good at the technical caregiving (bathing, dressing, changing, feeding) but I am bothered by how she baby talks to my mom and wants to “make her beautiful” by putting barrettes in her hair (which my mom has never used in her life). Anyway, I’m ok for her to make changes as long as it’s for facilitating ease of care. How do I address this with her without being rude? Am I making a big deal about this? Thanks for reading!
If she is far enough along with dementia her reality could very well be of a 5 year old.
I am the 24/7 caregiver for an adult 80 year old man .. He is in the seventh year of this disease. He is a 285 pound 5 year old that reacts and understands better if spoken to as a child . He can not process adult conversation.
I’d first see how my mother felt about the baby talk and barrettes . ( and notably depending on type and persistence of any baby talk it is actually instrumental for BABIES who should not actually be spoken to like they are adults ) anyway - if she’s okay with it I would grit my teeth and try to endure — some adults do regress to that point where they may not only tolerate but actually enjoy being treated in that way. However if she is bothered by it or not at that point then I would mention it to the caregiver. If the hair is an issue getting adult style hair clips might be a good idea. And my mom enjoyed having her nails done nicely which I continued fo do for her when I could and some of her caregivers did as well.