Follow
Share

I am a disabled, chronically ill, single Mom of two teenagers. My Mom has lived with me for many years due to inaccessibility issues in her own home with her wheelchair. My Dad moved in with us two months ago as dementia symptoms worsened. The two of them managed fine together with minimal help needed from me. Mom went to the hospital 2 weeks ago, putting my Dad in my care full-time, and it is overwhelming and taking a toll on my health. She was transferred to a skilled nursing facility and is not bouncing back, as the doctor put it. They are estimating that she will be there another 10-14 days. My parents have no end of life paperwork in place and no planning for anything has ever happened, except that I do have medical and financial POA. I am scrambling to figure out what to do. They have no savings to speak of, no stocks, bonds, etc. Their home is on property next door to me and is divided into 3 different parcels. They are signers on my mortgage (on my own separate property). I have started the process of cashing out the life insurance (under $20,000) so that I can see an elder care attorney. I have a consult scheduled in two weeks. Right now Medicaid is processing an application to get Mom into long-term care, and my Dad as well. Should I/can I, put a pause on this to buy time until I see the attorney? This would mean that Mom might potentially have to be released back here, and I physically cannot care for her. Will $20,000 be enough to cover all the issues of sorting out real estate issues, trusts, documents, getting assistance having my parents placed somewhere, etc? Do I need to buy time before Medicaid kicks in, in order to be able to potentially protect any assets, or is it too late, or would I still have time, even if Medicaid kicks in? I want them to get the care they need, however I'm very afraid that my children and I could end up homeless at the end of this because Medicaid could take everything because it is not protected by anything. I appreciate any and all help.

Very complicated questions here given their property, and it isn't something that you can be mistaken about. You are going to need to see an elder law attorney with all of your documents and deeds/titles in hand.
I wish you good luck. I hope you will get answers and options. But we are just caregivers from around the world, and we wouldn't have a clue on the fine points of all this for your particular state.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to AlvaDeer
Report

I would not start selling things or making assumptions until you talk to someone professional for your state who understands trusts and elder law and Medicaid.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to Geaton777
Report

You might be her financial POA but you are not obligated to pay her bills as she runs out of money. You can tell the social worker that she is an unsafe discharge as you are not able to care for her needs. She should be assisted to get on Medicaid and into LTC. You are spending down her finances with a lawyer which is OK. You can even pre pay for burial.
The lawyer should be able to help you complete this
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to MACinCT
Report

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter